Unexpected

An Indiana Birth & Parenting birth client’s positive unmedicated and unexpected hospital birth that lasted 3hrs 45min from start to finish. This is her story- in her own words!

My Positive Birth Story

by Brianna

For 9 months, I listened to and read the birth stories of dozens of women, as I did everything I could to prepare for my own. Now, I finally have my own story to tell, and boy is it a good one.

Pre-labor

To preface, it’s important to note that I’d had a long bout of false labor a week and 1 day prior to my daughter's birth. It lasted all day, and progressed very similarly to how actual labor would, with my contractions increasing in intensity and getting closer and closer together. Things seemed to plateau at 2 minutes apart, lasting about a minute long.

The contractions got fairly intense in that everything would become enormously tight, and take my breath away — though I’d still try to focus on breathing and relaxing through them — but they never felt painful, and even at their peak I could talk through them without much trouble. I thought, “If this is actual labor, I’m rockin’ it!”

Things remained the same, until about 6pm when they fizzled out completely. Sweet Josh was really disappointed… But I couldn’t afford to have any negativity in my system, so I refused to let any disappointment get to me. I was proud of my body for doing so well with its first labor practice. I decided that, from then on, I would ignore any contractions I felt. Otherwise, I knew that it would drive me crazy wondering when they would be the real thing. I figured that when it was actual labor, I would know. I was definitely right.

I had Braxton Hicks throughout the day every day after that (some stronger than others), but again, I tried to ignore them and continue as if they weren’t happening.

Fast forward a week and 1 day, Tuesday the 22nd, 5 days before my due date.

Early Labor

I decided to schedule an appointment with my chiropractor that day, instead of waiting till the next as originally planned. I’d been out and about and on my feet all day the day before, with no naps in between, and it was clear to feel the next morning that I’d over done it.

My mom and I went shopping for some house projects before heading to the chiropractor later that evening. I felt contractions every now and then, and brushed them off like normal. Dr. P. helped get me realigned and feeling good again, and we ended our outing at one last store: Whole Foods. Man… I will never see that place the same way again.

While perusing the aisles, I did feel a couple of contractions that were much stronger than normal, but again I ignored them and looked forward to returning home for some needed food and rest. We were at the checkout when it happened. I went to swipe my card, felt a very distinct pop, and then — almost simultaneously — full-on gushing.

I looked at my mom. “Oh my gosh… my water just broke!”

She gasped and asked if I was serious. When I told her it was still gushing, the starstruck cashier helped us finish our transaction and hurried us away with a “Congratulations!” We were so frazzled my mom followed me straight out into the parking lot, even though we’d parked in one of the spaces lining the store front… Whoops.

We got to the car, my mom trying to insert the keys in the ignition with shaking hands, and me trying to remember how to use a phone to call the birth center. At the time, we were about 20 mins from home, but closer to the birth center. The midwife timed my contractions while I was on the phone with her, and — since they were only about 30 seconds long at that point — determined that I should go home, eat some food, and try to rest instead of coming straight to them.

So we made our way back. Josh was super excited. My mom was super excited. I didn’t know what to feel! It was too surreal to fully grasp! It was time, and my job was to relax.

Early to Active Labor

Things progressed pretty quickly. The contractions seemed to be getting stronger on our way home, and I had to actively focus on breathing and relaxing through them. Once we were about 5-10mins from our destination, I told my mom I could direct her the rest of the way without the GPS. Well… I thought I could.

Not too long after, Josh called. “Hey, where are you guys going?” Thankfully he’d been using Find My iPhone to keep track of how close we were. We had most definitely missed the turn, and I hadn’t realized because of having to focus so much on contractions. Who knows how long we would’ve gone before I’d realized! My mom was visiting from out of state so she wouldn’t have known! Anyway… Blessings.

Once we finally got home, I knew I needed to eat, but things were getting more difficult. I changed into dry comfy clothes, and Josh tried to offer options for something to snack on while Mom made dinner. I couldn’t tell what sounded good. I needed to focus, and focussing was needing to happen ever more frequently.

Soon my father in-law showed up to accompany Josh in giving me a priesthood blessing, which was something I’d told Josh I wanted months in advance. They placed their hands on my head, as I knelt bent over the coffee table in our living room. At that point, my contractions were really strong. They were only a couple of minutes apart, still only lasting 30-40 seconds, but strong. Not comfortable.

Josh called the birth center again. We were all somewhat weary about how strong things seemed to be already, especially knowing we had a 40min drive — possibly longer with all the traffic going on that night — to the birth center.

The midwife still seemed convinced that we had a long way to go, and again made suggestions of things we could do to pass the time effectively.

Active Labor to Transition

After that dinner was ready, but I was only able to swallow a few spoonfuls of soup before I determined that I should get in the shower.

We got creative and put a large blue tote upside down in the shower for me to sit on. Upon sitting down, it suddenly popped so that it was concave. This ended up being a great thing, though it definitely startled me. One of the best laboring positions commonly used is sitting on a toilet; something about the legs being elevated slightly higher helps relieve some of the pressure and open things up. This impromptu bowl in the bucket created a similar effect, and I was able to labor fairly comfortably with water running down my back until the warm water ran out.

Things definitely sped up while I was there. The contractions became so strong I had to moan through them — low, soft, controlled sounds with each exhale — to release tension that I didn’t want going to the rest of my body.

I really had to focus to ensure that my jaw, hands, and everything was relaxed with each wave that came.

The contractions increased to lasting about a minute long, and I nodded as each one came to signal to Josh when to start the timer. He fed me yogurt between each one saying I needed food, even though the yogurt was more like dessert… Chobani S’mores flavor. Tasty food, but definitely more of a dessert. He was right though… I did need to eat something.

Things seemed to jump in intensity again after I got out of the shower. I merely transferred to the toilet, and it took all I had to get through each contraction. I was trying hard to stay relaxed, to keep my tone low as I moaned through each one, but it was much much harder. They were coming right on top of each other now. I could tell that it was exhausting, but I had no choice but to keep going. It took all of my focus…I was in the zone. Nothing else mattered as each wave came.

Josh was on the phone with our doula (we’d been keeping her in the loop the whole time), and my mom was on the phone with the midwife. I didn’t care. I had work to do. The midwife could hear me going through each contraction and finally said we should come in.

Transition to Pushing Stage

Josh hurried to pack up the car while my mom tried to help me get pants on… But it was no use. The contractions were coming so fast I couldn’t even get a leg in. I needed to focus. I remember breathlessly saying “I don’t think we’re going to make it.”, over and over again, trying to communicate what logically I doubted, but with every other part of me could feel was true: there was time no longer. This baby was coming, and coming fast.

Hearing me moaning — now more like a long and loud “Aaaawwww” with gasps for breath in between — the doula asked if I felt the need to push at all. Soon after she asked, I could feel the urges.

She quickly told us to call 911, and said she was almost to our apartment. She also told us to notify the midwife, and prepare a place for me on the bed.

The midwife was flabbergasted saying “You have to know, this is EXTREMELY rare.” I didn’t blame her for not telling us to come in sooner. It’d only been a couple of hours since my water broke, and it’s not uncommon for first time labors to last up to 24hrs, sometimes even longer. I was definitely the exception.

Soon I was on the bed, kneeling and bent over, with my arms crossed on the pillow. The contractions were so strong. It was all I could do to keep my voice from rising higher (this increases tension which can hinder the progress of each contraction, lengthen labor, and increase pain). But I didn’t have to think about the sounds that came out. The way it happened truly came naturally.

Transferring to the Hospital

Not too long after, our doula and the ambulance arrived.

The emergency technician guys came bustling in, one of them fearlessly approaching me and boisterously asking “So what do we have going on here?” As if it wasn’t obvious and I’d have no trouble at all responding to dumb questions. I was not going to waste energy responding.

They all started conversing about what to do, but I wasn’t paying attention. The doula was wonderful at her job and clearly communicated “Brianna, I know you’re going through a lot right now, but you’re going to have to make a decision.” Her words helped pull me out enough to comprehend the reality and gravity of the situation. Neither she nor the technicians were certified to deliver babies, so either Josh would have to do it, or we’d have to transfer to the hospital. Well, I was not going to make my husband do that, so I agreed to transfer to the hospital.

The technicians had brought up a gurney, which they then transferred and strapped me down to across my arms and chest. We live on the second floor of an apartment building, so they had to carry me down the tall flight of stairs. Well… kind of. They didn’t fully lift me. They just supported the gurney as they bumped me down. I closed my eyes at the top, told myself everything was fine, and made believe what was happening wasn’t actually happening. I was just..floating, bumpily but safely through the air. Yeah, that’s it. Bumpily floating. I could not afford to let any fear in. I would not. So I didn’t.

So, riding in the back of an ambulance… I can check that off the bucket list haha!

Josh came with but he had to ride in the front, so it was just me wailing through contractions in the back, with two random EMT guys trying to make small talk in between. One would ask every now and then, “Is she crowning?” To which the other would check to make sure I wasn’t. I tried not to think about how awkward that would normally be. When you’re giving birth, all inhibitions must leave.

One of them said that if I felt the urge to push, to try and suppress it — again, they were not trained to deliver babies — so I did.

Arrival and Admission

The interval between arriving at the hospital and giving birth was kind of a blur. I remember being wheeled down halls, but I kept my eyes closed for most of it to help keep my mind calm and convinced I was safe. At one point a nurse checked me and said baby’s head was very low, but I think that was before I was admitted to the labor and delivery room.

Soon I was on the delivery bed, and it was go-time.

Laying on your back is the worst position to give birth in: it narrows the opening of the pelvis and can hinder oxygen flow to baby, but for some women that position feels most natural and works just fine for them. Ideally, however, it’s best to work with gravity and experiment with positions that help to open up that area, thus making it easier for your body and baby to push out.

Back delivery is standard hospital procedure when birthing a baby, so not wanting to give the nurses a chance to tell me to do any different, I immediately got on hands and knees once I was on the bed; slightly on an incline because of the angle of the head of it; and — knowing it was now safe to deliver the baby — turned my knees inwards. Because I was well educated on all things birth beforehand, I knew that this adjustment would help to widen the pelvic opening where baby’s head would pass through.

I didn’t know this till my mom told me about it weeks after the birth, but more drama was happening behind the scenes downstairs.

My mom and the doula rode together, following behind the ambulance. Once they arrived they were trying to get to me, but the lady at the front desk wouldn’t let them. Everything had happened so quickly that the hospital didn’t even have all of my information, so there were complications with figuring out who could go where, etc. Both my mom and the doula were really frustrated, as you can imagine.

Finally, a police officer came in to escort the doula to where I was, but my mom had to wait longer. It probably felt like an eternity for her, but realistically it was only about 30 minutes at most before she was able to come up too.

I do remember a small part of me wondering where the doula and my mom were, but I didn’t want to worry about that. I figured time was just passing really slow now that I was at the hospital, and told myself they would be there any minute.

NOTE from IBP- Jacki will be sharing her POV soon, especially the events that unfolded when she arrived at the hospital ready to dive in and support her client.

Pushing + F.E.R.

Before I knew it, I was leaning in to each contraction with my whole body, and all tension was coming out of my mouth. I’d heard about this animalistic side of things in birth, but experiencing it was different than what I’d pictured.

I heard sounds come out of me I’d never heard before, but I was not afraid. All that is me was baring down with each contraction. I’d get a little pause in between for a few breaths, and then my body would start baring down again. It was like my body was programmed to do this all along, and I just had to let it.

I won’t lie, it was hard… But not really because of pain.

When I look back, I don’t remember much pain. I just remember tremendous power. It was so intense… words cannot describe. You don’t know how much power your being possesses until you experience that moment right there. All that has, is, and ever will be you goes into it, and the power that is released and manifest as a result is very nearly overwhelming. There is nothing like it.

The common pushing procedure we see is that, as soon as your cervix is fully dilated, the Dr. tells you to push while holding your breath for 10 seconds. But it doesn’t have to be that way, and actually it’s better if it’s not. Your body is under so much strain already, and has so much work left to do. It NEEDS oxygen. Also, as a woman, your body is perfectly designed to push out babies. All of the contractions leading up to the pushing stage were muscles of the uterus contracting higher and higher, tighter and tighter — simultaneously opening the cervix — so that once ready, they could push baby down and out.

Those specific uterine muscles are supposed to do the pushing, not you. When you hold your breath, you hinder oxygen from getting to those muscles, and when you try to take over and push all by yourself, you get in the way of this natural response your body already has, aka, the Fetal Ejection Reflex. Interventions like Pitocin will also shut down this response.

Knowing all of these things, I knew my job was the same as before: to let my body do what it needed to do, on its own time, and in its own way. So that’s what I did, and without me trying, my body started baring down and pushing baby out. True story.

Delivery + “Ring of Fire”

Josh was fantastic. He kept offering words of encouragement and complimenting me. My doula also encouraged me along the way, and reminded me to breathe between contractions which really helped. All of it helped. I remember hearing the nurses talking behind me, asking someone if this was my first birth, and commenting that I was doing really well. That also helped a lot.

Don’t underestimate the power of positive affirmations during birth.

I remember things escalating quickly once my mom was there. Suddenly, I heard her voice say “I’m here!” and it was like my body knew it was finally time for those final pushes.

I remember praying several times “Heavenly Father, please give me the strength I need to finish this.” Josh’s phone appeared next to me on the bed playing hymn instrumentals which spoke comfort to my heart. My mom came to me crying, and spoke words of tremendous love and comfort in my ear, but the line I held onto was “There are angels all over the room. I can feel it!” All of these things combined and I knew I had the support I needed from both seen and unseen forces to keep going.

I’d felt a little bit of burning a couple of times, but wasn’t sure if it was the “ring of fire” I’d heard about, which happens when the baby’s head crowns and becomes visible. But this sensation seemed to happen just before my contractions usually ended, so I’d let it go away each time as I’d relax and try to take deep breaths in between. I wasn’t sure if that’s what I was supposed to do, however, so when I heard someone say “When you feel burning, don’t suppress it.” I thought “Oh, ok!” And with the next contraction, I let it keep going.

Recently I learned that if it had been a midwife helping me deliver, they probably wouldn’t have given me the same advice. If a baby is forced out too quickly, mama is more likely to tear in delivery. Often midwife’s will hold their hand over baby’s head when it starts to crown, to slow the process and give your body time to stretch and adjust as the head passes through. If that had been done in my scenario, I probably wouldn’t have torn at all. But now I know for the future. :)

Seconds later, everyone was excited saying they could see the head. Man that was intense… But hearing those words always gives a boost of confidence because it means you’re almost done! Josh encouragingly told me “I can see so much of her head now!” So I kept on going, and before I knew it, our baby was flailing around on the bed underneath me.

Wow. What an amazing experience I’ll never forget.

Tearing, Placenta + More

Though I’d given birth, the trial wasn’t over. I held my baby to me while I birthed the placenta, which definitely wasn’t as hard, but still uncomfortable. I did have a first degree tear (the most minor tear you can have in birth), so they had to stitch me up. That wasn’t the most pleasant experience, but it honestly wasn’t too bad.

The thing I really didn’t like, however, was them touching and pushing on my uterus to slow down bleeding and check if it was decreasing.

Apparently I had extra bleeding (this can be common with fast labors since the uterus doesn’t have as much time to prepare), so they gave me several forms of pitocin to slow it down (the birth center would have done the same thing). One nurse did some weird but really uncomfortable thing where she shoved her hand inside and briskly moved it around, which I guess also helps…?

It did not feel good though, I can tell you that much!

There were several really uncomfortable things that happened after birthing my baby, but I comforted myself with each by reminding myself that it was almost over, and every procedure would be short, so I could hold on and endure that little bit longer. Plus, I had just given birth, man! I could totally handle those other things! Focussing on relaxing and breathing through everything helped significantly.

Being Released

It was so nice to have a husband and a doula who knew my birth wishes, and could advocate for me the entire time.

No medications, intermittent monitoring, immediate and prolonged skin-to-skin once the baby was born, delayed cord clamping, etc. To have that kind of support the whole way through was irreplaceable. So, though I didn’t get to experience giving birth in the birth center like we’d planned, I still had an amazing birth, and was granted every item on my birth plan (list you give to your medical provider of things you do and don’t want for your labor/birth). What a huge blessing!

Though unexpected things happened the whole way through, they worked out just the way they were supposed to. The birth center would’ve had us leave (as long as everything looked good) within 4 hours after giving birth. The hospital, however, didn’t let us leave till Thursday evening (Thanksgiving day).

Though a hospital is one of the worst places to get sleep, and one of the least comfortable places to be, it was nice not to have to leave anywhere for awhile. I didn’t appreciate feeling forced to stay that long, but I did appreciate the nurses accommodating our wishes on all other accounts the whole way through, and for being so kind, and was grateful the pediatrician let us go a few hours earlier than they originally said.

Conclusion

Leading up to week 37 of my pregnancy (37-42 weeks is considered a full-term pregnancy), I started consciously solidifying my mentality and attitude concerning labor and birth. I’d heard so many stories, and knew what I would like to happen. I’d prepared myself as much as I possibly could; physically, mentally, and spiritually; and had given myself lots of tools I could use when the time came, but in the end, I knew there was no guarantee what it would actually be like. So what do you do when something is so unpredictable? How do you keep from feeling anxious about it?

Well, the phrase I settled on was that it would be an “adventure”.

That worked for me, because no matter what happened, this was true: it would be an adventure. Something new, exciting, and challenging (in a good way, because I was prepared for it). Something to be explored, experienced with every part of me, and remembered for eternity. Something goal oriented, but open to change, and something after which I would never be the same. Character building? Absolutely. Testimony building? Undoubtedly. 100% worth it? You better believe it.

This is what I told myself and believed, and you know what? I was right on all accounts. It was the most wild, heated, and amazing adventure I’ve ever been on, and I dare say it won’t be the last (though it’s been recommended I try a home birth next time, seeing as births tend to be faster with each pregnancy and my first lasted under 4hrs!).

I am so grateful for my birth story. It is so fun! Like seriously… first time birth start to finish in under 4 hours? Water breaking like it does usually only in the movies, calling 911 and being transferred to the hospital on a gurney… What an adventure! What a story. I’m pretty proud of it, and so in love with the result of all I went through: our precious baby girl. Boy was she ready to meet us!